


Mutiny in Heaven

by JennieBlackheart



Category: Blixa Bargeld - Fandom, Einstürzende Neubauten, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, Nixa, Rowland S Howard - Fandom
Genre: Anal Sex, Drunkenness, Fights, First Time Blow Jobs, First Time Bottoming, First Time Topping, Gay Sex, Insults, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Rage, Rape/Non-con Elements, References to Drugs, Self-Harm, Semi-Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-12-07 09:27:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11620728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JennieBlackheart/pseuds/JennieBlackheart
Summary: Blixa and Rowland meet for the first time and after Rowland getting over his hate of Blixa, they undress each other and have sex in Blixa's room. Nick finds out about them and kicks them out of the flat....





	Mutiny in Heaven

"I still don't know what he sees in you." Rowland hissed with an acid tongue. "You can't even play the guitar proper, and even if you could, there is only room for one guitarist, and that's me." He made sure to emphasize. Up until that moment, Blixa had not spoken much English, preferring to fein that he didn't know it well, only to take in what the others said about him. However, with he and Rowland alone in the flat that they all shared, he decided to verbalize his feelings. "Nick thinks I'm beautiful." He replied in a heavy German accent. "He says I'm the most beautiful thing he's ever seen." Blixa added, with a dry lipped smile. "Has he ever told you that?" The anorexically thin man, questioned, as he moved closer to Rowland. 

Rowland gave a twisted frown and shook his head. He'd wanted Nick to. In fact, it was the one thing the man wanted, was too be noticed, not just as a band mate or friend. No, he wanted more, and Nick wasnt taking the hint. Now that Blixa, with his patchy hair cut and rubber outfit had come along, the chances of he and Nick having a relationship only became that much less likely to happen, and Rowland was fiercely jealous.

"You know, you are awfully pretty, too, Rowland, and Nick is a fool not to see it." Blixa told the man, as he inched even closer. "Don't talk about Nick like that, he's my friend, alright!" He said, defesively. "Maybe, but I can see you want more, everyone can, everyone but Nick." Blixa was so close, that he could now touch Rowland, and though he fought it at first, Blixa took one of Rowland's hands, and ran his fingers over it. "My, such perfection, I can only imagine what your hand's are capable of." Rowland's skin flashed red, and he yanked his hand away from Blixa, only to push him.

Blixa let Rowland push him, and continue to push him, until he was down on his back on the sofa, pinned down, Rowland in a rage. "Stay away from Nick!" He shouted, as Blixa looked up at Rowland, refusing to fight back. "I am, it's he that is after me, I can't help it!" The German shouted back. "Lies, you are a liar!" Rowland, went on. "No!" Blixa cried in his defense. He looked at Rowland with his watery blue sunken in eyes, so that the man on top of him could see he was telling the truth.

Angry, but convinced, he un pinned Blixa, and got up. Blixa was quick behind him, and rested a hand on his shoulder. Slowly, turning around, the German could see tears forming in Rowland's eyes, and wrapped his arms around him. "I'm sorry. I know how much he means to you." Rowland wrapped his arms around Blixa in his rubber outfit, and just stood, his embrace rather inviting. "Blixa, what can I do?" To which Blixa replied with a "Shhh..." 

The two men then lifted their heads at the same moment, and just stared at each other for a few minutes, before Blixa whispered, "Rowland.." and kissed him. Not fighting the kiss, Rowland kissed Blixa back, until they were both devouring each other hungrily, tongues flicking in and out, and finally Blixa biting Rowland's lip. 

"More." Rowland gasped, as they began to kiss again, this time each fumbling at the others clothes. "I cant get your blasted outfit undone!" Rowland groaned in frustration. Blixa used his own hands to take it off, and soon both men were naked, and back in each others arms. Blixa kissed Rowland's lips again, and the moved to the crook of his neck where he kissed harder, but not so hard as to leave a mark. Rowland, ran his hands over Blixa's thin butt cheeks, and began to knead them. 

Both men were hard, and as they embraced, their errections rubbed against each other, and allowed precome to bead up on each other's bellies, and become sticky. "Rowland, I want you, not Nick. Come to my bed and I will show you." Blixa asked. "Yes." The other man breathed, his eyeliner smeared, and lips crimson from kissing. "Yes." He nodded. 

Blixa led Rowland down the hall and into his 'hole in the wall' room, where lay a mattress and a blanket, and not much else. Rowland lay back on the mattrress, his whole body filled with desire. He wanted Blixa's touch, his words, but mostly he wanted the man inside him, to fill an emptiness he'd acquired, even if only for a short time. Blixa, finally in the arms of the most beautiful man he had seen, was anxious to take Rowland, to be his. Blixa licked an index finger, and gently inserted it into Rowland's ass, as he kissed his lips, throat, and then suckled on his nipples. Rowland could only gasp that he wanted more, that one finger wasnt enough, so instead of trying to prepare him more, Blixa moved to feed his throbbing red cock slowly into Rowland.

Once in, Rowland moaned, "Oh, God, yeah, fucking Blixa..." and rocked his hips, while Blixa moved in and out, muttering in German. Blixa went down low, and ran his fingers through Rowland's hair while Rowland had his arms curled around Blixa. Togethrer they moved, and sighed, writhing in passion, until finally heat began to rise in Blixa's groin and his cock became swollen. He screamed an unatural sound as he came, Rowland coming not far behind him. After they'd come, Blixa pulled out, and lay next to Rowland for a short while, just admiring him. Finally, he asked, "Does this mean you dont hate me anymore?" Blixa hoped with a small smile. "I never did, really, and I certainly dont now." Rowland promised. "I do think we should get our clothes on, though, who knows when the others will be back?"

Pt2

Both Rowland and Blixa had left their clothes in the main room, on the floor when they had become overwhelmed with their desire for each other, and now had to go retrieve them before anyone else came home. Rowland volunteered, to go out to get them, but when he got out to the living room he saw Nick, sitting on the sofa smoking. When he heard Rowland he looked at him accusingly, and stood up. "What did you do, you bastard? Where is Blixa?" He asked, in a near growl. "N-nothing, Rowland replied, his voice sounding innocent." Nick blew smoke in the man's face, and asked, "Oh is that so? Then why are you naked, why are you and Blixa's clothes on the floor?"

Nick slapped Rowland across the the face hard, and screamed and yelled about how he had no right to seduce Blixa, for in Nick's mind that was the only thing that could have happened.  
"Can't keep your hands to yourself, is that it?" Nick went on, each time with a slap. "No, no, please, it's not like that..." Rowland cried. 

Blixa, who could hear what was going on, rushed into the hallway, still naked, and ran over to Nick and Rowland. "Nick, leave Rowland alone..." He shouted, as he tried to pull him away from the man. "Why should I? He took what was mine, now I am making him pay.." He laughed, menacingly. "Yours, I'm not yours...Nick..I'm a person, I can make my own decisions." Blixa informed him. Nick only ignored him and continued to beat on Rowland. "Gott Verdamt Nick, lay off, it was me....I seduced Rowland...he's innocent!" Blixa finally shouted, angry tears in his eyes. He could see bruises already forming on Rowland's pale skin.

Shocked at what he heard, Nick let Rowland go, and turned to Blixa, and slapped him. Holding his face, he spat at Nick. "What the fuck is wrong with you, Nick?" We are your friends, your bandmates, and..."And dirty little whores, apparently, too." He said, finishing the sentence. Blixa swallowed hard, and shook his head. "No, Nick, no! Just listen!" Nick flicked ash onto the thin carpet and crossed his arms. "No, I've already seen with my own eyes. Now get dressed and get out!" Nick threatened. Each grabbed their clothes and nodded, then went back to Blixa's room to get dressed. Once they had, they left out the main door without a word.

It was a chilly afternoon and neither had brought a coat, so they sat huddled on a park bench, chain smoking until all of their cigarettes were gone. "You know, Nick has a temper, he'll settle down, and in a few hours we can go back." Rowland rationalized. "He beat, you, and you are defending him? Fuck! I can't believe that." Blixa exclaimed. He gently ran his fingers over the marks on Rowland's face and then kissed him. "Has he always been like this?" Blixa asked. "Eh, yeah, pretty much. If we both see a girl we like, well he can get nasty. Especially if she wants to be with me." He explained. "Well, he's not treating you like that now. I may not look like much, but I can fight, and I will." Rowland shook his head. "No, you dont have to, I'm used to it." He said. "You shouldn't have to be, I mean it. He's not laying a finger on you again!" Rowland looked into Blixa's bloodshot eyes and smiled. "Thanks." he said, and lay his head on Blixa's shoulder. 

After a few hours, the two did go back as it was getting dark, and they were both chattering their teeth. They opened the door quietly, and saw that Nick was passed out on the sofa, a syringe near by. They went back to Blixa's room and locked the door so that if Nick woke up and came back there, at least they would have a locked barrier between them. Then, both men took off their shoes and sat on the mattress. They each talked a bit about where they were from and how they got into music, but it it wasnt long before, talking became kissing, and kissing became touching.

"Rowland, I want you inside me, this time." He nodded, then looked away. "What's the matter?" Blixa asked. "I-I've never done this before, I've never been on top." Rowland stuttered, blushing. "Do you want to be on top?" Blixa asked, kindly. "Yeah, I just want you to feel good..." Blixa began removing his clothes, and looked at Rowland. "It will feel good, because it is you, and I want you." Rowland then took off his clothes, and straddled Blixa, moving down to his his lips, and get his fingers caught in the tangels of his hair. Blixa rolled his hips, so that their cocks rubbed, and let out a gasp. "Please Rowland..." Rowland nodded, and using salivia, and precome he prepared himself and slid himself into Blixa, each man trying hard to keep quiet, despite the intesity of their pleasure.

in and out of me, just like you would them." Rowland nodded again, and began to move his hips. In and out Rowland went, slowly at first, but then as he got the hang of it,much quicker.  
Blixa closed his eyes, as sweat began to bead up on his pale flesh, his breathing becoming heavier. Rowland, biting his lip to keep quiet, just kept moving his body, trying hard not to come too soon.

The two men, once again made love on Blixa's old mattress, their bodies one, under the blanket as they writhed in desire. Finaly, with Blixa being so tight, Rowland couldnt help but come, and when he did, it was all he could do not to let out a load moan. Having only gone a short time, however, Blixa hadn't had time to get off, and his thick hard cock remained weeping on his stomach. "Uh, I'm sorry I came too soon.." Rowland appologized. "It's okay, it was your first time." He assured him. "Yeah but...." Rowland wrapped his hand around Blixa's cock, and began to lick the head, before going further down. "Mmmm..." He moaned, as he bobbed his head up an down. Blixa spread his legs further, and let out a low moan. He had been right, those fingers were perfect, coupled with his mouth. Licking and sucking, Rowland continued, trying to recall what he liked done on him. Finally, legs shaking, Blixa gave Rowland a mouthful of warm come, which he let dribble down his chin. Blixa smiled at the look on his face. "Ja it takes some getting used to, but come here." Rowland moved towards him, and Blixa sat up partially, and put his lips to the other mans, and drank the come out of his mouth. "Snowballing." He laughed, as he lay back down. Rowland lay with him, for they both knew Nick would be out of it for hours.

 

Pt3

"I need a cigarette, badly." Rowland expressed, as he lay on his back. "I needed one after you fucked me!" Blixa laughed, as he turned, and curled his body around the man next to him. "Nick should still be passed out, we should get dressed and go out, not just to get smokes, but go out and eat or something." Rowland suggested. "You mean like...a date?" Blixa questioned. "Naw, well, we don't have to call it that." He said looking down. "It's okay..I don't mind calling that with you, just not anyone else. Certainly not Nick." Rowland nodded in agreement, and they both got up to dress.

 

Having fixed their hair an makeup, and Rowland having put on different clothes, the two crept through the house and out the door. It was cold enough so that they could see each others breath, but once they'd gotten on a train, they were warm again. They went downtown and to a shop to buy smokes and then walked around, trying to decide what they wanted to do together.

A few blocks away there was a bar, and not having seen anyplace else that interested them, they went inside and under a haze of smoke, sat down. Each lit a cigarette, and sucked in the nicotine, as if their lives depended on it, and ordered shots. Blixa ordered vodka and Rowland whiskey, and told the bar keep to keep the drinks coming until they'd said they'd had enough.

After quite a few shots, both men were drunk and laughing at stupid jokes and stories from their childhoods, and so they decided to slow down and drink beer. Blixa at one point nudged Rowland and told him he was going to the bathroom, and Rowland decided he would go as well. After each having had a piss, they both looked at each other and smiled. "You know we could..." To which Rowland nodded. Together they went into a stall, where Blixa pushed Rowland up against the wall, and gave him a sloppy kiss, while putting his hands down his pants, to make him hard. Rowland breathed heavily, and gave a a soft moan into Blixa's ear, as Blixa undid his leather trousers. Preparing himself with spit, he fed his cock into Rowland, who's mouth dropped open, as Blixa thrust, his hands gripping the metal of the stall.

Holding Rowland's hips he moved in and out of the man, handling him more rough this time due to lack of coordination, and the position they were in. They gave each other more sloppy kisses, as Rowland writhed up against the wall of the bathroom stall, Blixa driving his cock harder and harder inside the man. "Stop!" Rowland eventually cried out. "Stop, it's too hard, you are hurting me!" The man cried. "No, I'm not, I'm doing it the same as always." He replied, not understanding what the big deal was. "I'm not used it, and we've done it a lot..." Rowland begged. "Fine. That's just fine." Blixa removed his cock from Rowland, to see a twinge of blood, which he wiped off,before putting his cock away.

Without another word, Blixa fastened his trousers, and turned to unlatch the stall door, leaving Rowland behind. Rowland shrank down in the stall, and began to cry, not just because he was in pain, but because of Blixa's reaction. "What had he done wrong?" He asked himself. He could not help that after having sex for the third time, he was sore, so he stayed in the bathroom and cried a bit longer before adjusting his clothes, and looking in the mirror to fix his makeup as best as he could, before going back out.

When Rowland got out of the bathroom, he went back to the bar, but Blixa wast there. He scanned the smoke filled room, and still there was no sign of him, so he described him to the bar keep, who told him that a man matching that description had paid for their drinks and left. Distraught, Rowland ran out of the bar to see if he could catch Blixa, but there was no one around. Alone and upset, the man walked to the train depot, and caught the nearest one home.

Meanwhile, Blixa had caught an earlier train, and had already made it home. When, opening the front door, he saw that Nick was up and about, rattling dishes in the kitchen. Blixa went in and hopped up on the counter, and smiled at Nick. "Blixa, you smell, and you look like shit. Whattya want?" Nick growled as he made a marmite and cheese sandwich. "Nothing I..." Nick cut him off. "Where the fuck is Rowland, he in his room?" Blixa shook his head. "How the fuck would I know where he was?" He answered back. "Oh I dunno, maybe cos you were fucking him earlier?" Nick snapped. "Fuck you, Nick." Blixa shouted, as he hopped off the counter. "Don't you fuckin talk to me like that, you little bitch!" Nick snarled. He put his plate on the counter, and got up into Blixa's face, and shouted. "Now where is Rowland?"

"Fuck Rowland and Fuck you Nick." Blixa shouted, pushing him back. Nick let out a roar and pushed Blixa back, making his sandwich fall to the floor, and the plate break. The dishes in the cabinets also gave a rattle, as Blixa's head knocked against them. Both men went back and forth tearing at each others hair, punching and kicking, until they were on the ground bleeding. Finally, Rowland came home, and hearing the fight, went straight to the kitchen, and tried to pull the two apart. "There you go Nick, there's your Rowland!" Blixa gave each a dirty look as he stumbled down the hallway and passed out on his mattress, without even managing to shut the door.

"Where were you?" Nick asked Rowland, as he stood up. "I was at a bar with Blixa and things went wrong, and I dont want to talk about it." He ran his hands through his hair, causing it to stand up. "Whaddya me 'went wrong'"? "I dont want to fucking talk about it, I already told you that." Rowland frowned. "Good. Maybe you will keep your hands off each other, then." Nick took his attention away from the other man and cursed at his sandwich. Rowland, upset and confused went back to his bedroom, put on a record very quietly, and cried himself to sleep.

Prt 4

The next afternoon Blixa was awakened by a ray of sunlight that had managed to break through the cardboard that he had placed over the window when he moved in. It struck him right in the eyes, where he awoke with a blinding headache and a sour taste in his mouth. He had no recollection of the night before, except that he’d been drinking and that there had been a fight between he and Nick. He couldn’t even recall what it was even about, only the anger involved.

Slowly, Blixa lifted his body up, where he was greeted with a wave of nausea. Holding his stomach, he made it to his feet, and slowly walked out to the kitchen to get a glass of water. It seemed no one else was around so he took his glass and sat down in the living room to read yesterday’s newspaper.

Eventually, he heard the creak of a door, and turned to look. It was Rowland, and he too, looked as if he’d been through the wringer as he made his way forward. “Rowlie, go get some water, and come sit with me, the others seem to be gone.” Rowland turned his head and glared at Blixa, and if he could have shot daggers from his eyes he would have. Without a word, he went into the kitchen and got his own glass of water, and leaned up against the counter. Blixa, confused, got up and went into the kitchen as well and looked at the man curiously. “Rowland, what is the matter, you looked at me as if you wanted me dead!” Blixa asked. “After the way you hurt me last night, I almost wish you were!” He snapped, fire behind his eyes. “I don’t understand…I barely even remember last night.” Blixa confessed. Rowland put his head in his hand and frowned. “You nearly raped me last night, Blixa, don’t you remember, in the bar, back in the bathroom?”

"No! I would never do such a thing to you, Rowland, I care about you!" Blixa insisted, a sickness forming even more in his stomach. ‘What if Rowland was right? He couldn’t remember after all.’ This caused him to break into a cold sweat, and he wrapped a thin arm around himself. "You don’t care about me, you just care about getting off, well go try that with someone else, you are done using me!" Anger and sadness filled his words, as he slammed the glass down on the counter. He really believed that Blixa had cared for him, but after last night, he was not so sure.

"Rowland I’m sorry, I- tell me what happened. please…" Blixa nearly begged. Rowland folded his arms and stared at Blixa with his large eyes and told him how when they were together in the bathroom stall, having sex it became painful, and when he’d asked him to stop that he brushed him off. "You did stop, but I was really afraid that you wouldn’t, Blixa, and when you took your cock out of me, you could see that I was bleeding and you did nothing. You just left me there! He ended up shouting. Rowland’s face was crimson as he held back tears, and Blixa wanted nothing but to comfort him, but he didn’t dare.

Instead, he silently made for the hallway to go to his room, Rowland shouting as he went. “You bastard, you cant just ignore people when you don’t like what they have to say, life doesn’t work that way!” He cried. Blixa turned, and very quickly walked up to Rowland so that they nearly touched. “Look Im sorry, but I dont know how to deal with this. I never know how to deal with upsetting people so I just shut up and dissapear!” He then backed up from Rowland, and again made his way down the hall to his room, where he slammed the door.

Rowland bit his lip as hot tears ran down his face. He was so overwhelmed with so many emotions that he could hardly think. He looked at the glass on the counter, and broke it, then took a piece and began cutting at his arm. He focused on the rivulets of blood running down his arm, and dripping into the sink. He felt relieved of his thoughts, as he let the pain take over, not caring that he might cut too deep.

When Blixa, sitting on his mattress, peeling the paint off of his guitar, heard glass break, he dropped the instrument, and got up to investigate. His jaw dropped open as he saw Rowland bleeding, and quickly, he moved behind Rowland, and squeezed his fingers hard, so he would drop the glass. “Mein Gott, Rowland what the hell do you think you are doing?” He shouted, as he grabbed a nearby towel and pressed it to the man’s arm. “You’re not the only one who doesn’t know how to deal, this is my way.” He answered, emotionless.

"No, no…we need to get you to a hospital, now…" Blixa panicked. "I’m not going to any hospital, they ask too many questions, besides with you accompanying me, they would probably think you did this to me." By now, Blixa’s heart was pounding in his throat, the rag around Rowland’s arm nearly drenched. He then had an idea. "Rowland, come to my room, I think I know what to do." The man shook his head. "What, you think sex will fix this?" He laughed. "No, verdamtt, I have a needle and thread. I can sew up your wounds, if you will let me.

"Sure, fine, I don’t even care." Rowland replied as he was escorted into Blixa’s room. Blixa had him sit on the bed, and grabbed a partially drunk bottle of vodka and soaked a rag in it and told Rowland that he would feel pain when the rag was applied, but surprisingly, he barely flinched. Blixa burned the tip of the needle with his lighter, and threaded it, before telling Rowland to hold still. "This is going to hurt more, and it’s going to take awhile, but i am going to do the best I can, and try to be gentle, okay?" Rowland nodded, and the first stitch was made to close the first of three wounds. Working hard, Blixa’s fingers began to grow numb, but he kept going. Rowland just watched, speechless as he was worked on, until finally, Blixa was done.

Putting the sewing supplies up he said, “Rowland, you need to keep this clean, okay?” To which he nodded. “I will clean it for you, if you need me to.” After that, the two just stared at each other speechless. Finally, Blixa reached for Rowland, and held him close to him, and Rowland did not fight back. “I’m sorry I hurt you, I’m sorry i drove you to hurt yourself. Rowland, I really do care about you, I just dont know how to act. All of my relationships have been bad, with someone always getting hurt, and I don’t want that. I want to make you happy, I want us. Please show me the way.” Blixa cried.

"I can try, we can try. I do want that." Rowland replied. "I like you a lot, and I want to be with you, but you have to listen, you have to be gentle with me, unless I say otherwise, understand?" Blixa nodded and kissed Rowland’s cheek. "Yes, I can do that, just please, please dont hurt yourself like that ever again, okay?" Rowland shook his head. "I cant promise you that, but I can promise I will try." With another kiss, Blixa whispered, "okay."

The two lay together on Blixa’s now blood stained mattress and talked until neither could keep their eyes open. Then they slept in each others arms until the next day.


End file.
